Buddha's Enlightenment January 12, 2008

It took me two years to come back to India and now I am safely back in the sacred vibe, the mothership.

I had an interesting talk with a native Indian at the Howrah train station in Kolcata - he says it's getting superficial here too after I told him about the States and how everyone runs around in a panic trying to make money and how you can't use the word God without people thinking that you are a fanatic or at least a born-again Christian. Then he suggested we travel together. I said, "I have only known you ten minutes." Indeed. I didn't want to kiss him. And hot he ain't. Some men think that because I am solo that I have been waiting for their lewd advances without any consideration of who I am or what I like in a man.

Hogwash.

Anyway arriving in Bodh Gaya in the dark at 5:30 AM after an 8 hour train ride swinging on a berth over a snoring man was fascinating. I even had my ear plugs in and after shaking Mister Snore Box with my hand he still did not wake up.

Then I caught an auto-rickshaw which I later found out was supposed to be hugely dangerous by yourself as it is known to be an area where auto-rickshaws are held up with guns on a regular basis. Nice. In the mystical foggy pre-dawn light we bounced over pitted, potholed roads flanked with mud houses and villagers making fires to warm themselves. It was all very colorful of what I could see of it but I just kept talking to my angels to get me there safely in this tuk-tuk which is a motorcycle fitted with a dirty cabin on top but it gets the job done.

I had to demand that another man joining us be thrown out of the cab and they obeyed me. This girl doesn't go in the dark being outnumbered especially when I am paying the inflated tourist rate. The driver apparently wanted to give his friend a ride but you never know so I tossed him out.

We arrived at the stupa where Buddha attained enlightenment - even the Dalai Lama hangs out here on occasion. I was anticipating a peaceful communion with God but instead there were throngs of monks in a sea of maroon amid the racing tuk-tuks and bicycle rickshaws with drivers coercing the crowds for paying passengers. Mayhem. Who could possibly be up at 5:30AM? For some reason; thousands of monks on patrol to the stupa kicking up clouds of dust.

Then.

After an enchanting welcome at the Thai monastery where I will do the Vipassana 10 day meditation program I met my guest-house owners; Ram and her brother. Ram's husband was killed in a car crash 5 months after they were married. And she has a 5 year-old son who was born right after he died. Business not so good but when I pointed out to her that she owns property - she seemed to brighten.

Bodh Gaya itself; the dirt, sky, and water here are sacred. The stupa is glorious. It has a holiness, a divine aura. It is surrounded by gorgeous gardens and was encircled by monks chanting so to keep from being stampeded I sat and gazed upon it for quite a while.

Then I heard a small child say, "Mama" and the tears just flowed non-stop. My son has not called me that for centuries and I had not realized it until then. When did he turn 21 and become a man? It all went so deliriously fast; the years rushing by in sped up motion then a tiny voice saying Mama to bring back the memories of holding him in my arms which I can now no longer do. I felt sadness and wished that I had appreciated the beauty of what I had when he could sit on my lap and I could kiss him as much as I wanted to. Heartbreaking.

But I did get to talk to him soon after and it warmed my cockles. My heart felt happy again. Then I went in search of the bodhi tree, the exact spot on earth, where Buddha attained enlightenment. I sat down under a nice looking tree and had a great meditation then realized it was the wrong tree after asking one of the authorities. It got better when I found the tree and settled down to watch the merriment of people of all ages and nations running to catch the bodhi leaves that naturally blow off the tree in the breeze. No cheating. You have to wait for a leaf to blow off you can't just pick it.